The Diary of Raoul Grincheux

Part 9

Which is entirely a vicious subterranean fight with Trolls…

Wildday, Disorderweek, Fireseason, mid-afternoon & mid-fight

So I’m ready to stick Blen’s Trollkin but there’s anuvver four behind an’ three of ‘em’s drawin’ clubs an’ cummin attus. I ain’t no Humakti an’ I ain’t up to fightin’ two at once so I hit the leftmost Trollkin wiv Invisibility, figurin’ the uvvers’ll go for me an’ the Humaktis, one, two, three.

While I’m doin’ that a Trollkin ‘ead rolls in front of me – looks like Spathi’s bein’ busy – anna jav’lin flies over me ‘ead and hits the one Trollkin wot’s still usin’ his sling. I ‘ears a gasp from Lady Samal behind me so I reckon she’s bin hit by the slinger. Wozit her wot frew the jav’lin?

Me spell works an’ I can tell from his expreshun that the Trollkin has lost me in mid-charge. Invisibility is a great spell ‘cos it don’t stop the geezer from seein’ you, just stops him from realizin’ he’s seen you, so the Trollkin don’t run inta me, he akterly goes all the way round even while he’s lookin’ for me. I ‘ears him bash inna someone behind me, reckon it must be Lady Samal. I ‘opes she can ‘andle ‘erself.

Blen sticks his Trollkin inna gut an’ it drops to the floor wivvout any ‘elp from me. Azit goes down, it lashes out at me but misses an’ hits his mate cummin up on the uvver side.

Someone puts up a Darkwall to me left an’ I can ‘ear very ‘eavy stompin’ cummin from behind it – reckon the Great Troll’s about to lay in – I ‘ope it dunt come after me!

Them Trollkins go after Blen an’ Spathi, leavin’ me free after all, so I steps away from the Trollkin onna floor, whirl round an’ attack Lady Samal’s Trollkin, ‘cos I reckon she needs some ‘elp an’ it woz fanks to me it went after her inna first place.

I sees the Great Troll come outta the Darkwall and go for Sieur Thomas – all the Trollkins shout sumfink in Trollish, sounds like ‘Idti, Zog! Idti!’ I reckon they’z cheerin’ it on. Merde! Izza a big bugger, an’ no mistake, an’ Sieur Thomas is fightin’ a Trollkin too – akterly, theyz all outnumbered over there an’ it looks right ‘airy but Lady Samal’s got her ‘ands full ‘ere.

Me, I’m right where I like to be – inna dark an’ behind some git wot dunno I’m ‘ere. But someone can see me ‘cos sumfink hits me inna right arm – no idea wot but it dun ‘alf sting!

Me first stab at Lady Samal’s Trollkin misses an’ I nearly falls flat on me face. Lady Samal’s parryin’ an’ I fink she’s castin’ spells, lookin’ a bit desprate. Luckily me next stab gets the Trollkin inna arm an’ it drops its club.

I reckon Lady Samal can ‘andle an’ armless Trollkin (‘armless – geddit?) an’ I fink Sieur Thomas needs all the ‘elp he can get so I leaves Lady Samal and goes for the Great Troll.

But before I can get there anuvver Trollkin comes outta the Darkwall an’ I gotta fight it face-to-face – I’z not an ‘appy rat! But I gets lucky, I knocks its club aside and sticks it inna leg wiv me dagger. It falls over (I fink it woz hurt already) an’ I gets right behind the Great Troll wot’s still hammerin’ Sieur Thomas wiv a maul – Merde! I’m glad that ain’t me! Sieur Thomas ain’t me faverit bloke but he’s bein’ proper heroic holdin’ up this monster. I’da bin a smear onna floor by now.

I don’t know wot Sieur Thomas is doin’ from in front but I stabs the Great Troll from behind. I hits it ‘ard inna arm but it’s got real armour and fick ‘ide so I dunno ‘ow much I hurts it. Then it grunts an’ drops its maul. Next fing I know Sieur Alphonse an’ Stella pile in from the sides an’ the Great Troll goes down wivva real wallop – only some neat footwork keeps me from under him.

I fink we’re winnin’. There’s a Dark Troll come from somewhere, fightin’ Spathi an’ Blen, an’ the Heliots an’ Eliza all go ‘elp ‘em. Lady Samal’s finished off her Trollkin an’ she’s doin’ sumfink wiv her helmet but she’s safe.

So sudden-like it’s quiet where I am – the only Trollkin onniz feet is Harmonised. So I furckles frew the Darkwall to see where the Great Troll came from – I reckons the fightin’s about done an’ I’m worritin about Pierre’s dorter.

So I find’s a passage – musta bin a bit of a squeeze for the Great Troll. I can see a glimmer of light up ahead an’ I can ‘ear wot sounds like a little girl hummin’ to herself – akterly she’z hummin’ quite loudly iffen I can ‘ear her over the clangin’ behind me.

I finds a smaller cave. There’s a big bed to the left – an’ I means big, looks like the Great Troll din’t kip by izzelf. At the uvver end of the cave izza big bronze oven – well Trolls iz known for their cookin’, right?

But right in front of me izza little girl wot has to be Pierre’s dorter – but she’z playin’ wiv anuvver little girl, only this one’s a Troll – she ain’t wearin’ much an’ I reckon she’s gotta a lot of nipples – she’za Mistress!

I’m right gobsmacked! Lookin’ at the bed I reckon we’z just killed Mum, Dad an’ all their kids – the whole family, ‘cept for Little Miss Midnight, ‘ere!

Then I ‘ears Sieur Alphonse yellin’ me name – I yell’s back that I’ve found two little girls but he just wants me back inna big cave. The two girls seem to be gettin’ on fine so I leaves ‘em to their game. Nyver ovvem seem put out by the scrap inna next room.

So I’m wanted ‘cos some people took a real bashin’ an’ needs their hurts seein’ too – reckon I’m the nearest fing to a Healer we got. (I’ve already healed me arm wiv Rathealin’ but I dunt reckon that’ll work on anyone else – ‘less someone’s keepin’ real quiet ‘bout their famly ‘istory.)

So Lady Samal’s first an’ she’s got two nasty ones which I binds up best I can – she looks a bit ‘appier but her leg’s hadda right seein’ to an’ she arsks Blen for a bit of Healin’ so she can walk again. (So I ain’t the only ‘ealer but Blen moans ‘bout bein’ short on Power – yeah, you an’ me bofe!)

Blen izzelf has copped a nasty one but turns out it woz done by his mate Spathi! These fings ‘appen when you gets a rumble inna dark.

Sieur Thomas copped a hefty one from the Great Troll. I does a real cool job on him – of course he dunt say nuffin’ but he akterly gives me a grin when I’ve finished.

While I’m dishin’ out the bandages I tells everyone about the two little girls, an’ that one’s a Mistress! They’z gonna kill all the Trollkin wot’s still goin’ – includin’ the Harmonised one, which seems a bit harsh – an’ get the ‘eads for the bounty – 5 shillins a pop! The Dark Troll’s worth 50 shillins anna Great Troll is 100 shillins. For a minute I really fort they woz gonna lop the Mistress kid’s ‘ead for the 500 shillin reward but Sieur Alphonse says they’d never get 500 shillin for a little girl so we’z takin’ her back alive – reckon we might getta bounty for her or we might not but I reckon the Trolls would ransom her back – dunno how we’d do that, though; it ain’t like any of us speaks Trollish. Wait, ain’t there a Troll Embazzee in Heliopolis?

An’ as well as the ‘eads there’s loadsa loot – looks like Pierre weren’t the only merchant they rumbled ‘cos there’s lotsa trade goods – real mixed bag: booze, cloth an’ wotnot. An’ inna chest by a pool we finds a lotta lead coins (worth nuffink in Heliopolis, dunno wot they’z worth in Sophia but the Heliots don’t reckon they’re worth it – well if they dunt wannem I’ll take ‘em, that’s 90 groats an’ 12 big coins!)

There’s also a very nice dagger wiv loadsa gems onna hilt, some glass beads, an orangey-red gem wivva beetle init (Troll jewlry, I reckon), a real posh tunic which Lady Samal says is silk an’ some ivory playin’ pieces for some game like chess but for trollball, which izza Trolls’ favrite game. An’ there’s some books in Trollish, most iz cook-books but some aren’t an’ I fink one’s a diary.

The real problem will be workin’ out wot to leave behind ‘cos we can’t take it all, not wiv 17 Troll ‘eads an’ two little girls. I wooden mind learnin’ ‘ow to play that trollball game but I ‘spect we’ll be sellin’ ‘em. Bet that tunic’s worth a mint!